The image of my dead dog.

I keep having this one image in my mind of Bijou after he was dead.My mom yelled for me and when I got up she had his lifeless body in her arms.I picked him up and grabbed a blanket in me and Jim’s room to swaddle his body.My mom went outside to try and make a grave for him and bought him all wrapped up outside.And I think it was when Jim came home to help us.I picked up his body in the blanket and the blanket fell off his little face a little bit.His head was back but I remember his top lip was sort of hanging back because of his head being back.And I could see a little sliver of pink.Pugs have black lips but if you look at the inside of their lips/mouth their mouths are pink.And for some reason I can’t get that image out of my head.It torments me over and over and over.At night if I don’t take a sleeping pill I just see the image over and over in my mind and it upsets me so bad.That and how his little arms were stiff but his little hands were jiggling outside of the blanket as I was walking with him to bring him to Jim.I’d be a total liar if I said that in the past few days I didn’t wish,hope and pray that God would just kill me in my sleep.

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~ by uglyshyla on February 26, 2013.

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